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Narration 05

from Tales from Mojo Saturn by Blue Diamond

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lyrics

Narrator: The magical chamber is emblazed in a radiant purple glow. The Song-less Count gazes deep into the Grand Mercury.

Song-less Count: This immense power has finally met its match. Soon the kingdom will yield to me. Goblin, destroy this rock & we will lord over this kingdom in infamy!
Narrator: The goblin warlock begins to perform a destructive spell.

Song-less Count: Yes! It’s time! The pr-

Captain Saturn: Not so fast!

Song-less Count: Saturn!?

Narrator: Standing in the doorway is Captain Saturn, the Toad Queen and her royal guards.

Toad Queen Constupa: Song-less Count, I have foreseen the day your thirst for power will transform you into a traitor.

Song-less Count: Transform? I’ve awaited this moment for eons. To subjugate this pathetic kingdom to my evil will; to once and for all bring an end to this dreadful music!

Toad Queen Constupa: These royal songs are the life-force of the galaxy.

Song-less Count: Pshaw! You call these songs!? To my ears they sound like a cacophony of progressive nonsense; so over produced with instrumentation that any theme residing in the melody is completely stifled by the composer's lack of restraint. But enough talk! Now it is time to kneel before me!

Narrator: The Goblin blasts off a magic missile just as the royal guards propel themselves onto him. The warlock tumbles down and his magic missile careens in a wild trajectory blowing a hole in the wall. Just then, the Toad Queen casts a psionic wave; the blistering ray spins around the room before striking the Count, melting him into a smoking puddle of thick bubbling goop.

Song-less Count: Arrregggghhh!

Toad-Queen Constupa: Take this goblin to the dungeon!

Narrator: The goblin spends many of the following nights in the cold damp dungeon before being taken to the royal court and placed on trial.

credits

from Tales from Mojo Saturn, released March 4, 2022

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